In my final year dissertation, I delved into exploring a therapist's relationship with anger. The emotion of anger, often considered taboo, holds significant intrigue for me. Many individuals view anger as a sign of losing control, a belief prevalent among patients and clients. Through my research, I've uncovered the vital role of a counsellor embracing their anger to foster a safe space for clients to address their own anger and the underlying emotions that fuel it.

What is Anger?:

Anger is a potent emotion characterized by displeasure, annoyance, hostility, or antagonism.

 

Effects of Anger:

When individuals experience anger, they often feel the need to defend themselves, entering a 'Fight or Flight' response mode.

 

Underlying Emotions:

Anger can serve as a mask for deeper emotions such as rejection, abandonment, grief, hurt, fear, frustration, sadness, or vulnerability. Explore the emotional wheel provided below this blog for further insights.

 

Physical Reactions to Anger:

Physiologically, anger can trigger various physical responses, including an accelerated heartbeat, chest tightness, sweating, and tense muscles.

 

Hormonal Impact:

Anger is known to prompt the adrenal glands to release stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol into the body.

 

Neurological Response:

Neurologically, anger redirects blood flow from the gut to the muscles, preparing the body for potential physical action.

 

What can cause a person to experience anger:

Unmet Expectations: Anger can arise when you feel certain expectations, desires, or values aren't being met.

Feeling threatened or attacked can also trigger anger.

Lack of Control:  A sense of powerlessness or inability to correct a situation can lead to anger.

Failing to Respect:  Other people not respecting your personal and professional boundaries, feelings, or property can cause anger.

Frustration: Anger can lead to a person feeling powerless, frustrated, sadness, fearful that if you admit about being angry, what will the response be from the other person and other negative emotions can converge into anger.

 

What is the best way of Managing Your Anger:

Being Able to identify that you are feeling angry without having the need to justify it which can be difficult.

Take a Break: Stepping back from the situation to obtain some head space and calm yourself down.

Deep Breathing: Breath work is helpful or deep, diaphragmatic breathing to help soothe your nervous system.
Grounding Techniques: Use of a grounding technique to help you regain focus and balance on your surroundings which will regain control.

Challenge and reframe potential negative or exaggerated thoughts by journaling which can be a cathartic release

By communicating and expressing your needs as well as setting healthy boundaries in a calm and assertive manner will help

Allow yourself time and space to feel the anger and then find healthy ways to process it such a journaling combined with breath work to ground yourself too will help

Seek Support:  Talking through things with a trusted person or a counsellor can help you obtain some clarity as well taking the edge of your anger and not feel alone when managing this emotion. If you are struggling with anger, consider seeking help from a therapist or counsellor.

 

If you are struggling with anger, then please reach out to me today to book a consultation today.